I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
Randomize
