I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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