i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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