Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
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