I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
