They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
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Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
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I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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