Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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