Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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