If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
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