ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
we're so committed to being not committed
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
