I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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