you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
it glows. i had to have it.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
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