When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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