we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
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He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
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You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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