i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
The best revenge is premature balding
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
We had sex on a dog bed..
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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