It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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