the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
