tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize
