i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
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