brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
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