So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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