Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(480): View more from Arizona

too bad you live with your parents still

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(480): too bad you live with your parents still http://tfl.nu/9a6o

Replies (9) Good night (514) Bad night (3002)
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(515): View more from Iowa

Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms

(712): View more from Iowa

Oh God

(515): View more from Iowa

I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship

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(515): Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms (712): Oh God (515): I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship http://tfl.nu/mj00

Replies (31) Good night (1184) Bad night (2069)
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(914): View more from New York

After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!

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(914): After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT! http://tfl.nu/umoe

Replies (129) Good night (6317) Bad night (676)
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(315): View more from New York

So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.

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(315): So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave. http://tfl.nu/cgpg

Replies (46) Good night (797) Bad night (9579)
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(774): View more from Massachusetts

i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"

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(774): i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness" http://tfl.nu/ogi9

Replies (5) Good night (2955) Bad night (915)
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(618): View more from Illinois

Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.

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(618): Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly. http://tfl.nu/ma4l

Replies (2) Good night (2059) Bad night (2056)
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(810): View more from Michigan

my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.

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(810): my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities. http://tfl.nu/947a

Replies (12) Good night (2371) Bad night (603)
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(804): View more from Virginia

I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.

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(804): I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years. http://tfl.nu/h8vw

Replies (8) Good night (1920) Bad night (730)
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(360): View more from Washington

corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.

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(360): corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me. http://tfl.nu/hdp7

Replies (3) Good night (972) Bad night (1312)
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(613): View more from Ontario

She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think

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(613): She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think http://tfl.nu/7fbd

Replies (21) Good night (835) Bad night (1917)
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...

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(+44): The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off... http://tfl.nu/dj4h

Replies (2) Good night (1285) Bad night (419)
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(513): View more from Ohio

I think they're German

(203): View more from Connecticut

Just say lederhosen and see what happens

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(513): I think they're German (203): Just say lederhosen and see what happens http://tfl.nu/u5tp

Replies (8) Good night (1478) Bad night (546)
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(901): View more from Tennessee

No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.

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(901): No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state. http://tfl.nu/kqwr

Replies (8) Good night (1194) Bad night (411)
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(541): View more from Oregon

Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday

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(541): Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday http://tfl.nu/3cvq

Replies (1) Good night (781) Bad night (305)
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(336): View more from North Carolina

Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.

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(336): Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net. http://tfl.nu/v16i

Replies (0) Good night (425) Bad night (454)

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