why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
