I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
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