I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize