I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
