My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Randomize
