Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Good news!! I can adult!! π turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ππ
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