i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize