My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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