its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
21 NSFW Facts About Famous Celebrities That Will Blow Your Mind
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
These Are 19 of the Most Horrible Strangers People Had to Sit Next to
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.