oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
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