So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Randomize
