Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
