Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
