She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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