Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
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