I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
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