Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Randomize
