PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Randomize
