There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize
