Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
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