Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
