I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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