Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
