im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
