i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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