so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
