new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Randomize