I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize