she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
